1. Sherry Vine & Misstress Formika — “Fight For Your Right To Be Queer”
The Gist: A song about being unapologetically queer in the face of adversity set to the tune of “(You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party).”
Best Line: “Your dad just gagged ‘cause he caught you in drag / And then he threw away your gay porno mag!”
Best Visual: The “parents” sitting on the couch next to two boys making out.
2. Igor Dewe — “Sexual Obsession”
The Gist: A weird greaser man follows a slightly disinterested object of affection around while gyrating. Dewe is Russian, lives in Paris now, and wrote “All against Russian anti-gay law! Let’s do some Love propaganda” when he released this video.
Best Line: The song is less than special. The best part is certainly watching the singer dance around in a unitard in a fountain.
Best visual: Unitard. Fountain. Gold belt. Can’t stress it enough.
3. Double Duchess — “Deviant”
The Gist: Maybe it’s a party? A nightclub? There are a lot of flashing lights, and you’ll become addicted to the song.
Best Line: “I come so far ‘cause I know what’s good / A little bit of class and a little bit of hood.”
Best Visual: Probably the purple dildo nestled between boobs.
4. Big Dipper — “Meat Quotient”
The Gist: Little Big Dipper gets sent out to get some “meat,” by his mother, commences singing about penises while literally surrounding himself with meat — the man-kind and the kind they sell at grocery stores.
Best Line: “My craving for crotch-meat is growing vigorous.” (I wasn’t kidding.)
Best Visual: His head packaged like steak you buy at the store.
5. Detox, Willam, & Vicky Vox — “Silicone”
The Gist: “Dancing On My Own” rewritten to be about injecting black-market silicone. Very funny, slightly worrisome, seriously fabulous hair.
Best Line: “My shape is plastic it’s so nice / I’ll be your flotation device.”
Best Visual: The operating table. SHIVERS.
6. Johnny McGovern — “The Gayest Of All Time”
The Gist: A beautiful fantasy of literally all of the gay people in the world having the biggest gay party ever, and it’s weirdly catchy.
Best Line: “The roof will be burning ‘cause everybody’s flaming away.”
Best Visual: The girl in the sunglasses who was definitely uncomfortable.
7. Willam Belli, Detox and Vicky Vox — “Boy Is A Bottom”
The Gist: “Girl On Fire” reworked to be entirely about someone’s ass. Plus they do great harmonies during the breakdown.
Best line: I don’t think I can even type any of the lyrics without turning red.
Best visual: When they’re screaming, “That boy is a bottom,” at the poor boy while he’s in public.
8. Kitty Crimes — “Find A Penny”
The gist: Kitty Crimes is a queer rapper who looks like a cross between Mia Kirshner and Sara Gilbert, plus she’s really funny. That’s all you need to know.
Best line: “Love is when you cry so hard, it dampens your body, and everybody thinks you wet your pants.”
Best visual: Kitty Crimes dancing while wearing a bow tie next to a lip-syncing old guy.
9. Persia ft. Daddies Plastik — “Google Google Apps Apps”
The Gist: Drag queens dancing against backdrops from Google Maps, singing about gentrification and displacement of queer people of color. No joke.
Best Line: “Hey girl, did you tag me in that pic? / Silicon / Silicon Valley / Hey girl, did you get that eviction notice?”
Best Visual: When they all start putting on white face.
10. Mod Carousel Featuring Leeni — “Can’t Be Tamed”
The Gist: Three guys turn into unicorn superheros and set out to save the world in the name of gay rights. All to the tune of “Can’t Be Tamed.” Only good things.
Best Line: “I can’t be tamed / I can’t be blamed / I have a mane.”
Best Visual: The three boys doing perfectly choreographed dance moons in honest-to-god hooves.